A man who carries a gun is trouble. I mean the guy who is packing heat on his person or in his car rather than someone who uses a gun for sport like target shooting or hunting. Why do I say that you may ask? “There must be a good reason he has a gun or he wouldn’t have one,” you might say. That is the point. These guys may claim they carry a gun in case they need to use it in self defense. Self defense of what is the question.
- he is involved in something criminal
- he has a job that involves dealing with criminals and thinks they will find him in his “off” hours
- he is paranoid to the point he feels he needs the ability to maim or kill
- he enjoys the power
Being with this guy meant being in the line of danger -at least that is what he believed and he thought it was fun.
The second guy was someone I met while a single mom the first time around. We were both in sales at the same company but in different divisions. On the surface this guy seemed perfectly normal; friendly, well groomed, confident but he was a troubled person on the inside. I probably wouldn’t have dated him in the first place but the company president had decided to exclude the corporate sales guys from the Holiday party so I invited all five of them as my dates in an act of anarchy. The pres found out about it and realized how stupid his ruling had been and reversed his decision. This guy sort of ambushed me in the hall one day shortly after the decision reversal and asked if we were still going together and without thinking I said , “Of course”.
The following Saturday he asked me if I would help him with some Christmas shopping. We went to a big urban mall and pretty much he just tagged along while I shopped. He didn’t really have anyone to shop for except his mother. The next time I saw him socially was Holiday party time.
We went and had a good time but I was a little uncomfortable with how he hovered around me- it was a company party after all we both knew most of the people there. On the way home he began to share some personal information: the anger he felt towards his ex-wife for divorcing and a horrific story about how he and his friend had been robbed at gunpoint. His friend had been mortally wounded in the incident and he was still quite distraught though it had been several years past. He then leaned over towards me and opened his glove box to reveal a loaded gun. At that moment I was glad we had met in the neutrality of the office parking lot that night and he didn’t know where I lived.
Work was a little awkward after that but by then I had decided to got to graduate school and was leaving to start school in January. But just before Christmas and few days after my last day at that job, he asked me to lunch. I was curious, so I went. During dessert he placed a little store wrapped box on the table. It was a pair of 1/4 diamond stud earrings.
“I cannot accept these,” I said. “It is way too much.”
“Just take them,” he said. “I don’t have anyone else to buy a gift for . No strings attached. How often will you get something like that with no strings attached, honestly? Just keep them.”
OK, so the earrings were nice but the guy was nuts.
I left. Went to grad school and fortunately nothing bad happened but it was a lesson. This man was in the paranoid/power place and who knows when those people will snap and on whom?
It is foolish to stand around waiting to find out – nice gifts or not.
What are your thoughts about men who carry hand guns?