Category Archives: bikini waxing

First Date: Mr. Dancing With The Stars


So , going back to last Friday….

I am supposed to meet Mr. DWTS at 6:00pm at a local dance studio for a West Coast Swing lesson.  I adore dancing and as a single mother on a rather fixed (often fluctuating) income, I rarely get out to dance other than the occasional Zumba class.  So I was excited to learn a new dance.  Sam was spending the evening with some friends and needed to be dropped off by 5:45pm in order for me to get to the studio on time (which I had to google because I am still rather new in town so a little more wiggle room on time would have been nice but schedules matched this way).  Around 4:45pm I begin the process of choosing my outfit.  in answer to a Facebook plea for fashion advice earlier in the afternoon, my friend Jeanine suggested jeans and a nice top as a good “go to” first date outfit.  I decided on my white jeans which I washed earlier in the day and a sleeveless silky ruffled necked  top  both from J. Crew.

Here is the outfit I put together:

At 5:05pm I start to get dressed and realize that all of my nude and white panties are in the dirty clothes hamper.  AGGGHHH!  I really hate the thought of any indication of colored underwear underneath white pants so I freaked.  I had to wash some nude seamless panties in the sink then toss them in the dryer in hopes they would dry in time.  I put on make-up, tried to create an alternate outfit which was a dismal failure and checked the dryer which seemed to be almost completely ineffective at this point.  How long can it take to dry one pair of panties on low anyway?  Apparently longer than 20 minutes because at 5:28pm I grabbed the still slightly damp panties out of the dryer and sucked it up and put them on, jumped into my jeans and headed out the door with a slight grimace on my            face as I felt the cool clammy feel of my underwear.

All in the name of propriety, right?

I made it to the studio about five minutes late and the lesson started. When I got there it really hit me how little I know about this guy.  I met him once and barely know anything about him, including his last name.  He made more than one comment about my “dancing” shoes (the only pair of slick soled shoes I own are highish heals with leopard print and patent leather pumps) which made me uncomfortable. He also seemed a little nervous and wimpy as a dancer at first but about half way through the lesson started to ease up a bit and get into the groove.  Dancing was fun.  I learned a tiny bit about West Coast Swing and enjoyed the safe interaction.

Afterwards we drove separately to a nice restaurant downtown.  Here’s were I panicked.  As we sat down to chat I really REALIZED for the first time the implications that this man reads my blog.  Suddenly all the posts came flooding into my head and  the relationship between us seemed way off balance.  I said something about how awkward that was and he said, “I already know everything about you.  You had a bikini wax three weeks ago and  you have on nice underwear.” (The irony here is that I have on an ancient, ugly, rather worn out racer back bra and icky 95% dry panties.)

I guess I had never truly considered what impression someone might have of me if they knew me only from my blog.  It was certainly interesting that these were the things that stood out about me.*

We had a wonderful meal with excellent service and a nice conversation which revealed to me that we have  too little in common to be romantically compatible.  I would like to dance some more though. Maybe he would consider a dancing partner type of relationship until he finds someone else who is a better all around partner for him?

*NOTE TO SELF:  Do not give out blog info to potential dates.

Going Brazilian Part VI: Trends in Bikini Waxing


Just when you thought the subject of bikini waxing was done, you are surprised by one last post regarding trends.  Yes, there are trends.

Creating shapes with the hair  at the top of the labia is a current trend according to Sue Ismiel, Executive Chair of Nad’s Natural Hair Removal. “Some of the most poplular shapes are the heartbreaker, the thunderstruck, the landing strip and the Bermuda triangle.”

Click here for a link to her video.

“I have had people request initials but that is really hard to do,” says Kimberly Austin of Bombshell salon in Richmond.


Heartbreaker:  heart shape design of pubic hair

Thunderstruck: a lightening bolt design of pubic hair

Landing strip: a small rectangle shape from the bottom of the underwear waste band to the top of the pubic bone or shorter

Postage stamp: a very small landing strip on

the pubic bone

Bermuda Triangle:  a triangle shape with the top points facing the hips and the bottom point at the top of the labia

For more on trends click here for an article in Glamour Magazine.

Thank you for bearing with me during this exploration.  Hopefully it has been informative at the very least.

I had my wax this morning and I feel great!  Looking forward to wearing a bathing suit over spring break next week without worry.

What is something that you do that helps you to feel confident and current?

Going Brazilian Part V: Tips for Bikini Wax Virgins




Tomorrow is the big day.  I have an appointment at Simple Spa in Charlottesville and in preparation for spring break I am going Brazilian. Though it is far from my first bikini wax experience, I couldn’t help thinking about women who might try this for the first time and how nice it would have been if someone had told me what to expect.  If you have been reading this series up to now you know how to prepare for your wax, what to look for in a salon.  Now it is time to get an idea of the procedure itself.

I remember being a bit intimidated at first.  I mean aside from my most recent wasband (remember I have two of them) and my gynecologist, that area of my body had remain unseen by another human being for 12 years or so.  The purpose of all this is to give you an idea so you can decide if this sort of  update to your look is for you.

So here is an outline of the procedure:

You should be escorted to a private treatment room in the salon where you will be asked to undress from the waist down (remember to keep some socks on unless you have neat, clean feet).

If you are shy (like I was when I started bikini waxing) the salon should offer a one -size -fits -all paper string bikini you can wear during the wax process.  You may also bring an extra pair of older panties to wear if you like, but be warned they will probably get wax on them. If the salon fails to offer the panties you may ask for them.

Once you are disrobed to your satisfaction, you will be asked to lie on the table.  Many salons use towels to cover up vulnerable areas if you like similar to how a massage therapist will use a towel to cover your breasts during a massage.

The wax should be warm rather than scalding and applied with something like a popsicle stick.  Audrey Nell Smith from Bombshell explains why the first time you wax is the worst:

“The first time is the hardest time but it gets easier each time you wax. Before you wax the first time the hair is pulled from the body the hair folic le is strong and the hair is strong making the pull effect of waxing the worst it will ever be. Once that bond is broken it takes less effort to remove the hair from the folicle and often after years hair stops growing all together. The pain is similar to quickly ripping a band aid off.”

You may be asked to put your legs in some interesting positions in order to get to some hard to reach places.

After your wax, your esthetician my apply some special cream and should advise you on how to deal with ingrown hairs.

Then you get dressed and go home to take a shower as you may feel a little sticky afterwards.

First timers should avoid sun exposure to the waxes area for a couple of days.

Audrey also suggests taking ibuprofen before your first wax to help control swelling or pain issues.

Tomorrow: trends in bikini waxing- you won’t want to miss that one!

Are there any other beauty topics you are interested in exploring?



Going Brazilian Part IV: Etiquette


Thank you for staying on this journey with me.  Just one or two more posts on this subject and it will be done.  If you are just signing on to Dating by Committee you will notice that this is the fourth installment.  If you are interested in the previous related posts, please click here for the most recent which has links to the other two as well.  We have already discussed some definitions for types of bikini waxing,  and what to look for in a salon.  Proper etiquette is the subject today.

You see, the positions that one must get in in order to properly remove hair in the bikini area and the very nature of the act call for a prescribed level of cleanliness.  In order for the experience to be as pleasant as possible (possible being the operative word in this case) for all parties involved, there are certain things one can do.

In order to get the perspective of the “other” person involved in bikini waxing, I called upon Audrey Nell Smith, an esthetician at Bombshell Salon in Richmond, Va.  Audrey has performed “a few thousand Brazilians,” she says, and one day allowed me to interview her while I was literally on the table

Proper Bikini/Brazilian Wax Etiquette According to Audrey:

  1. Be clean.  Shower the day of your wax and make sure all areas “down under’ are clean. Schedule your wax before your workout rather than after.  If you must workout before your wax, either shower afterwards or at least make an effort to wash the area to be waxed.  Audry suggests “being clean from front to back, cleaning the whole area.”
  2. Be on time.  Waxes are usually booked fairly tightly together so tardiness on your part may result in loosing your appointment.
  3. Have clean, neat feat or wear clean socks. Just a point of consideration for your waxologist.
  4. Exfoliate.  Exfoliation the night before helps to loosen the hair and rids the skin of excess skin cells which may effect the “grab” factor of the wax.
  5. Take an Ibeprofin beforehand.  If your skin is sensitive and you tend to get really pink after a wax, an ibeprofin will help reduce the swelling quicker.
  6. Get the No Scream Cream by Relax and Wax available online at  If you are highly sensitive to pain using this special cream will help.
  7. Inform your Waxologist.  If you are having your period or have any medical conditions going on down “there”, let your waxologist know so she may be prepared.  If you are on your period you should wear a tampon or choose to reschedule your wax.

Can you think of anything else you might do that would constitute good manners in this situation?

Going Brazilian Part III: Tips for finding a Salon


I am happy to report that the “wax” blogs are generating some interesting conversations and I am excited to bring in an expert today to help out.  To view the previous blogs on Going Brazilian simply click here and here.  Otherwise, find out what a shmancy salon in NYC has to say about cleanliness.

So, before going to get a wax of any kind, it is important to understand what hygiene the salon practices for your safety.  Below is some information sent from Shobha Salon of New York– experts in the field.

Shobha(r) Bikini Waxing Safety: Pre-care Pointers

1. Observe Your Surroundings – Similar to preventing infection during a manicure or pedicure, waxing facilities must be clean and strict sanitary processes must be followed to provide uncontaminated supplies, eliminating the potential for infection during the treatment process. Your practitioner should always:

a. Use clean, disposable implements or hospital grade disinfectant for any tools that are reused.

* Wear gloves.
* Clearly wash hands before and after each client.

2. Steer Clear of Double Dipping – The nauseating truth is that double-dipping is common practice in wax application. This method uses the same spatula for the entire treatment, re-dipping the used applicator back into the vat of wax. This contaminated wax is then reused for treatments on other individuals. “Unfortunately, this technique can increase the chances of potentially harmful bacteria spreading from one client to another, which is particularly disturbing when dealing with the bikini area. That’s why we follow our strict No Double Dip Policy (SM) for all sugaring and waxing treatments at Shobha,” Shobha Tummala, Founder and CEO of Shobha says. If the facility does not offer such a policy, request a new can of wax at the start of your treatment to avoid contaminated supplies that have been used on other clients.

3. The Truth About Tweezers – Many aestheticians place tweezers, typically used to remove stray hairs after a bikini wax, in their pockets, drawers or even leave them lying around, causing them to be susceptible to various types of harmful bacteria. Plus, they are not likely to be sanitized between every client, which can increase the potential for contracting an infection during a treatment. “Tweezers should always be sanitized with a hospital grade disinfectant every time a service is completed. Here at Shobha, we only thread to remove stray hairs to avoid this potential safety hazard entirely. Our thread is never reused and is completely sanitary. While our Specialists may hold the thread taut in their mouths for better accuracy, this part of the thread never comes in contact with your skin.” says Shobha Tummala, Founder and CEO of Shobha.

4. Know Your Professional – By law, your wax practitioner must be licensed with the state to perform professional treatments. This license should be displayed in the place of work. For New York State, you can check online to make sure your practitioner is current with his/her paperwork online (This licensing requirement may vary in Canada; your local department of commerce should have more details).

5. Be Menstruation Free – Generally, it is best to get a bikini wax at least a few days before or after your period. The closer the treatment is to your actual period, the more sensitive your body becomes because your immune system is lowered, making you more susceptible to infection.

6. Try a Patch Test – Before undergoing a full treatment, if you have never waxed previously it is best to try a small area (known as a patch test) first. Wait 48 hours between the test and full treatment to see if you have any adverse reactions.

Shobha, New York City’s celebrated hair removal expert, is known for its consistent quality and client sensitivity embodied in its line of products and all-inclusive treatments for the brows, body and bikini. Shobha also caters to its clientele via its online presence


137 Fifth Ave, 8th FL
New York, NY 10010

Thanks Shobha for the information!

What other things might you want to know about a salons before waxing?


Disclaimer:  I have not received any services or been offered any services paid or otherwise from Shobha salon at the time of this writing. MB

Going Brazilian Part II: The basics


Two days ago I started blogging about bikini waxing and how this has become a normal part of grooming that many women entering the dating scene following a long term relationship may want to explore.  (To see my introduction to bikini waxing click here.) I pointed out in the post that if you have had only one sexual partner for the last 15 to 25 years you may be out of the loop on the trends because way back when you started dating that man bikini waxing was reserved for strippers and hookers.  Now it is a mainstream activity and the expectations of grooming “down there” may be a bit different than the last time you thought about it.

To confirm that other newly “divorced” middle aged women were interested in this topic I spoke with Kimberly Austin.  According to  Austin, a 5 year veteran “waxologist” at Bombshell Salon in Richmond, there has been an increase in middle aged divorcees waxing in the last several years. Says Austin, “Two years ago 20% of my waxing clients were over 30.  Now the breakdown is about 60% younger women and 40% older. Most of these women are coming in after a divorce.”  “Getting a wax can help you feel sexy and more vital.  It can be a factor in an older woman gaining confidence to try new things.”  says Victoria Snapp owner of Simple Spa  in Charlottesville who has had clients dramatically change their hair and try pole dancing after beginning waxing the bikini area.

It is pretty dramatic going from a full “bush” to nothing so Austin recommends starting with a standard bikini wax (tops of the inner thighs, plus a quarter inch in towards the labia and anything above the panty line) and moving inward a little more each time you wax until you are ready for none or next to none. “Most women go from a regular bikini wax and work their way up to a French wax (all hair off the back side of the buttocks, some hair on the labia) then to either a full Brazilian (everything) or a landing strip (everything except a small strip of hair from below the panty waistband to the top of the labia),” she explains.

Advice to consider:  Start out slowly and work your way up to “the full Monty”  if that is where you think you want to go.

Tomorrow I will explore salon cleanliness issues to ask about before booking your first appointment.

Do you think getting a bikini wax would make you feel sexier and more confident?